Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Easy come, easy go especially when you go to the dentist!

Money that is!! I went to the dentist on Friday and back again today and now I have another appointment in August. Can I say that I hate the dentist? Not literally, really I love Dr. Holton but I hate, hate, hate going to the dentist. I find it very painful and I just don't like it. Friday and today I had to have a VERY deep cleaning, like below the gum line deep and now the Novocaine is wearing off and the side of my face is kind of numb and when I drink my afternoon coffee, it is dripping out the side of my mouth. Lovely!!!

I have to go back in August, because right before my Florida trip, as in the day before, I had a tooth break apart. Of course now that has to be refilled and capped. There goes another $1000! Who can I complain to about this? Can I protest??? I considered just having it pulled, but it is kind of visible to the side and personally I like having teeth and I'm just not ready to go there yet. Of course, I could be like my father and just pull my own teeth, but I don't have the stomach for that. Did I say before that I don't like pain? His version of dental care is to take a pain pill, have a shot of whiskey, go outside in the bright sunshine, position the side mirror on his truck, take a pair of pliers and yank out the offending tooth. I don't quite have the testicles for that one. Of course, I don't have testicles either, but I have always coveted them. I would like a great big gold set myself. Just to say that I have them.(LOL, I'm trying to be nice in saying things like this in my usual smart*ss way)

See, one more thing that makes my dad a redneck. Speaking of my dad and the crazy stuff he pulls I do have another interesting story that he did this week, which I find quite humorous. As I have mentioned before, my dad lives in a very small town in the rolling hills of Virginia, and do I mean SMALL!! It's the type of place where everyone knows everyone and all are always trying to be in someones business. Typical small town atmosphere. Well, my brother, Scott is one of the co-owners of his business Kinex(pronounced connects). One of the other owners is Jim G. who has a son named Andrew. Anyways, Andrew has never met my dad but my dad is aware of Andrew. Last week, my dad goes to the McDonalds(which is THE happening place in Dillwyn, BTW) and sees Andrew getting out of one of the Kinex trucks. He proceeds to walk up to Andrew and the following conversation ensues.

Clyde(my dad)- "Do you know Scott Chidester?
Andrew - "yes, yes I do"
Clyde - Well you know he's gay. (see this is my dad trying to stir the pot up in this small burg of a place, no offense to the gay community here! If you want to get someone gossiping there you can talk about their sexual orientation or say that they are having sex with someone other than their spouse, as long as SEX is in the so called gossip it will fly all over town because these people have nothing better to do with their lives)
Andrew - "Uh, no, no he's not. He's married"
Clyde - "Do you know Jim G?" My father says in return knowing full well it's Andrews dad.
Andrew - "Why, yes sir, I do"
Clyde - "Well, he's gay too" and then proceeds to walk away.

Needless to say, Scott then gets a call from Andrew and Andrew then tells him "Uh, Scott? Does your dad drive a silver T-bird?" Scott replies in the affirmative and Andrew proceeds to tell Scott what he pulled. So typical of Clyde. He has nothing better to do than to cause discontent in the community. Just like the time my dad and Butch went into the Radio Shack in Farmville to buy batteries or something. The clerk asked my dad for his phone number and my dad proceeded to say he didn't have a phone because he lived in the dipsty dumpster behind Food Lion. The clerk was speechless and Butch wanted to sink in the floor.

I guess I come from a long line of smart*sses. At least it gives us all something to talk about.


  1. This smart a** post proves we're related!!

  2. Of course we are. I need to do a post on just how we are related. Boy, won't that give everyone something to talk about. I consider you more family than a lot of the others that are so called family by blood. I guess we need to do the old pricking of the fingers to draw blood and then smooshing them together. Then we will really be family, LOL! Anyways, it's like Lewis, when you feed them long enough they become yours regardless of whether or not you gave birth to them.